John Maxwell’s Ten Leadership Keys: Understanding People

In this post, we’ll discuss the fifth of John Maxwell’s tenets, “A Person of Influence Understands People”.

Well, in his book, “Becoming a Person of Influence“, there is a passage which states, “if you can’t work with people and understand them, you cannot accomplish anything. And you certainly can’t  become a person of influence.”

Let me examine this for a moment.   Is this true?

When I recall working in a home care environment (working with and for residents who were physically challenged),  what do I remember about that time?

Truthfully, I can recall that it was necessary (at times) to take a step back to reflect on what had just been  said to me.   If I didn’t do this, misperceptions would occur.

This would then develop into problems that affected the residents, the very people I was to care for !

 

 

It was a labor-intensive position (taking care of others) and so essential to be a good listener!

 

In our society, lack of understanding (misunderstanding) is a frequent problem.

In fact, in John Maxwell‘s Becoming a Person of Influence, he says that 3 of the reasons people misunderstand others are:

1. Fear
2. Failure to Appreciate Differences
3. Failure to Acknowledge Similarities

Be Honest with yourself – ask yourself if you’ve ever felt fear or prejudice toward another individual (perhaps someone of a different race or religion who you just “did not get”)

 

Things Everyone Needs to Understand about People

1. Everybody Wants to Be Somebody
2. Nobody Cares How Much You Know until They Know how Much You Care
3. Everybody Needs Somebody
4. Everybody Can be Somebody when Somebody Understands and Believes in her
5. Anybody who Helps Somebody Influences a lot of bodies!

 

The key here is:   Choose to Understand Others

 

In understanding others,  you should consider the following:

• What is the Other Person’s perspective
• Extend personal empathy
• Give people positive feedback
• Be constructive with your remarks
• Employ positive thinking in your dealings with others

Now, take a brief test on yourself.   Rate Yourself Honestly :

1. I can nearly always anticipate how folks will feel and react in a given situation.
2. Most of the time,  what people do and want makes sense to me..
3. I am surprised by people just as often as I’m able to anticipate their thinking.
4. Most of the time, people’s feelings & motivations are a mystery to me.

How did you score?

If you were number 3 or 4,  you might consider picking up  John Maxwell’s Becoming A Person of Influence

 

The key here is:   Choose to Understand Others

 

Oftentimes, people are fearful in the workplace; they’re afraid to contribute their ideas, because they tend to fear one of the following:

1. My co-workers, or boss, won’t like the idea
2. My idea will get rejected
3. I’ll be considered a troublemaker
4. I won’t receive credit for my idea
5. My boss will be threatened by my idea

On the flip side, let’s look at this from the point of view of the co-workers – what is their level of understanding as they listen and try to understand a co-workers idea?

If your desire is to have a POSITIVE Impact on the world, then you NEED to be able to understand others.  Don’t let your prejudices, or initial fears of your co-worker get in the way.  Set these aside, and LISTEN with respect.  Have an open mind.  For once you have the ability to understand others, you can potentially influence EVERY other aspect of life.

 

Understanding people greatly affects your ability to communicate with others; the worst thing you can do when you are speaking to people is to put the priority on expressing your feelings & ideas.  You need to look outward, into the eyes of your co-workers – and be ready to listen to their ideas openly, and with respect.  For this is what people SECRETLY want – to be LISTENED to, and understood.

 

Thus, the moment you get the words out, you should become “all ears” – be an empath, and FOCUS on being a keen listener.  Show respect to the person speaking (don’t look distracted, or disinterested for a moment) – and only once they have completely finished can you paraphrase what the speaker said, to re-enforce your understanding and support for their viewpoint.

Now, the foundation has been set.  The two of you can potentially come to a meeting of the minds.  For the MOMENT that people sense they are being understood, the more motivated they become to understand your point of view.

 

Further Reading:

Self Improvement